Former Marine turned photographer Joel Parés’ series Judging America used real people dressed as stereotypes to remind us to not judge a person based on their tattoos, clothing, ethnicity, profession, or sexual orientation, but on their merits.
Damn, the tears on the widowed mother…
I’ve been meaning to share this story…
So I had just completed the swim portion of my triathlon and I felt GREAT; I completed my longest swim distance yet (800m) and swam it straight through, never stopping to rest, which was something I’ve always had to do. The race was off to a really good start for me.
I bolted out of the transition area on my bike and kicked up the pace. I was determined to keep up my good time thus far.
Halfway through the bike, I reached for my crotch for some reason and as I made contact with it, I couldn’t feel anything. I could feel the penis itself with my fingers but I felt absolutely nothing the other way around. There was no fucking feeling in my penis. At this point, I started to panic as worst case scenarios started rushing through my mind.
"Holy shit, why don’t I feel anything?!?! Fuckfuckfuckfuck I CAN FEEL MY PENIS IS STILL THERE BUT WHY DOESN’T IT FEEL ANYTHING?! Fuck. Omfg. FUCK. FUCK!!!"
At this point I was still pumping hard on the bike. I wasn’t going to waste my good time on the swim! But at the same time I was fucking scared that my penis had fucking died or something.
To double check and make sure that it was even still there, I pulled my compression shorts outwards and looked in. Yes, it was still there. SO WHY THE FUCK COULDN’T IT FEEL ANYTHING?!
I start to run a diagnosis in my mind:
- Okay, I just finished swimming…
- I’m still wearing the compression shorts from the swim so they’re still wet
- I’m biking at 20MPH and my crotch is collecting the most wind.
- This could mean the wind is blowing at my wet compression shorts effectively making the area within my compression shorts a freezer and ultimately freezing my dick.
"Shit. Did I freeze my dick? Fuck."
I reach inside my pants again and touch the damn thing a second, third, and fourth time.
"Damn, it is significantly colder than the rest of my body. Oh, shitshitshitshit. Did my dick get hypothermia or some shit?! UGH I should stop. BUT I’M MAKING SUCH GOOD TIME. WHAT DO I DO?!!!!?!?!?!?!”
At this point, I temporarily concluded that my dick had somehow gotten hypothermia, however ignorant and stupid that may sound LOL but I didn’t have any other theories. I keep biking hard while trying to decide whether or not having babies in the future was important enough for me to stop biking in order to warm my dick up.
"WELL FUCK, OF COURSE THE WELLBEING OF MY FUCKING PENIS IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE TIME I GET ON THIS TRIATHLON, WHAT ARE YOU, A DUMBASS, JUSTIN?!"
Yet I just kept pedaling and pedaling, at the same time, trying to tuck my penis as tightly as I could against my thighs in an attempt to spread body heat through it. It wasn’t working. I still couldn’t feel shit.
Then, thoughts of having to sever my penis and never being able to have sex again or have babies or even just have a fucking penis, run through my mind over and over again. All the while I kept questioning why the fuck I was still pedaling as fast as I could. Certainly my penis was more important than having finally achieved a good swim time LOL.
Eventually, I reached the hilly part of the bike course and as I stood up to put the power down and prepare to bike up that first hill, I suddenly felt a rush of intense heat flow through my penis.
Oh my fucking god. I had been so focused on keeping my pace up that I was pushing down on my seat so hard that I was cutting off circulation to my dick.
I was so fucking happy and so fucking relieved. Goddammit.
people say ‘I love you’ in a lot of different ways
'get some sleep'
'here have my fries'
'Im gonna draw you something'
7/1/14 (via purestik)
Sometimes I think it’s such a shame that I’m so into cars and driving.
Tonight I walked home from a birthday house party. And wow…
Walking a path that I’ve only driven past for the last 4 years makes for an entirely new experience.
You get a chance to really take in the smells, sounds, sights, stars, and everything you’re usually forced to overlook. You start to notice how each individual space along a road rests in it’s own undisturbed state - the sort of patterns and shadows that each tree casts on the ground past each street lamp and the sort of sounds that echo throughout the valley without the never ending whoosh of cars rushing by. What is usually a 30 second trip just on the way home has now been extended to a 40 minute experience.
And boy, it was nothing of spectacular.
Ah the hidden joys of life… Fucking amazing.
I need more friends. Why isn’t there an app to do that T_T ….
What I’m really terrified of is leading an average, ordinary life with a regular job and an invariable routine, planned holidays, an average household, fixed responsibilities and not doing anything different to be remembered by.
JDM lifestyle, yo. 🔰🌃😴 haha jk. Hey man we tried our best. Really enjoyed wrenching through the night with you even though we GG’ed in the end… #alwaysastudent #miata #jdm